Christmas Morning at the Carnivore Club

I've posted a free read! A prequel to Christmas Afternoon Delight. Wonder what Barry was up to at dawn, before his date with Lily? Come on over to Got Romance Musings...

http://bit.ly/gCQbb8

Kate and Dana dine with the Dragon

Dinner with the Dragon or How to Avoid Being the Main Course

Kate and Dana poked their heads back out into the hallway. "I don't see anyone," Dana said. "Should we just stay here?"

"I don 't think so," Kate replied, coughing. "I think the hall is a little less dusty, since it doesn't have any hangings or draperies. Let's see if we ca find our way to the dining room." She led the way, stepping bravely out in to the stone corridor. "Let's go to the right."

"Why the right?" Dana scurried to catch up with Kate's longer stride.

"Why not?"

"Okay." They came to a corner and Kate turned to the right. This time Dana just followed, shrugging her shoulders. They had to go one way or the other, and without any knowledge of the castle's layout, it didn't really matter.

"Wait." Dana laid a hand on Kate's arm. "Listen."

Finally, My Love News

Today Finally, My Love is released and the author is too busy snoopy dancing to do anything else. Check it out at http://www.breathlesspress.com/ and tell me what you think!

He's a dragon?

"What do you mean he's a dragon? And that sparkly thing is enough to tell you that?" Kate's voice rose to a squeak at the end.

"Kate, keep your voice down, please! I am pretty sure he doesn't know I am a dragonslayer - why would he, right? And I'd rather he didn't know we were aware of his other side. So lets just clean up, as best we can in this filthy room, and go out to dinner. Look here's a pitcher of water, we can at least get the dirt from that tunnel off our faces and hands."

Kate stared at Dana. "Dinner? And do you think we are likely to be dinner?"

"Ordinarily I wouldn't think so, but I know less than nothing about this place. So we need to stay aware and try not to do anything to make him think we're a danger to him."

"But you are a danger to him, right?"

Dana narrowed her eyes and fingered the knife hanging from her waistband through the cloth of her skirt. "Oh yeah, I am a big danger to him. The question is...does he know?"

Kate and Dana Meet the Dragon

Kate followed Dana into a small bedchamber where they were evidently intended to refresh themselves. She turned in a slow circle, taking in the tattered bed curtains and window draperies, the mildewed bed covering, and the dusty stone floor. "This is where we are supposed to clean up? It's filthy." She shook out her hem, sneezing as a cloud of dust rose around her. "Something is so wrong here."

Dana looked up from examining something in her hand. "There's something wrong, yes."

"Do you suppose that man even knows he has a dragon on the battlements?" Kate sneezed.

"The dragon isn't on the battlements right now, Kate." Dana looked back down at her hand.

"What do you mean it's not on the battlements? We've been underground - how do you know that? And what is that in your hand?"

"Don't get cranky on me now," Dana said. "Look at this." She held her hand out to Kate, palm up.

"What is that? It's shiny."

"Haven't you ever seen a dragon scale before? That was no man, Kate, or at least not a man like you mean. That was the dragon, and we're really in deep now."

Kate and Dana: The Dragon

Kate saw Dana stash the weapons and managed to grab a small copper dagger herself. She didn't know there were copper weapons, but it was the closest one to hand and she slipped it into her bodice as she began to move toward the stairs.

"Welcome to you both," the man said as they began to climb the crumbling stone steps toward where he stood. "I trust we haven't had you stumbling around here in the dimness long."

Kate looked around and was stunned to see that the walls had stopped glowing. She realized they had begun to fade at about the point where the man appeared above them and the little villager had disappeared. Odd, but not something she wanted to deal with right now. There were a few torches stuck into brackets on the stair walls, as though they had expected company and thought to light the way. Stranger and stranger.

Dana, as usual, led the way, the braver of the two. "I presume we are not the only guests for dinner, sir?"

"Alas, you are, ladies. I find that it's difficult to attract company up here on the tor. But we will enjoy a fair repast and each other's company as best we can." He gestured for them to precede him through the heavy, banded oaken door and into a stone corridor. "Up one more set of stairs and you shall see my castle proper."

They continued down the hallway and came to a slightly broader set of steps, these better lit, with more torches, than the last. Before they began to climb these, the man turned and bowed deeply from the waist. "I neglect my duties. I am Simon Leclerq, and this is my home. I bid you welcome."

Dana extended her hand, "I am Dana and this is my companion Kate. We have traveled far to come here, and are grateful for your hospitality."

Kate stared at Dana, speechless. In this strangest of circumstances, Dana seemed to know how to behave. Did she travel the space-time continuum often? But she dipped her head as well, when the man bowed to her.

At the top of the stairs the decor became moderately better, with glassed candle holders mounted on the walls providing a glowing light. But the floors and walls were still stone without any more adornment, and the stone looked a bit crumbly to Kate's uneducated eye.

"Here is a chamber where you may take your ease and refresh yourselves before dining." And, opening the door, the man left them behind to explore this new and strange room.

Kate and Dana Under the castle

"We are, said their host, "Officially under the castle."
Dana and Kate looked at him. It didn't seem as though they had been traveling that long, but underground, with the glowing walls lighting their way, it had been hard to tell distance.

"What is this room?" Kate asked.
"The armory," Dana answered, looking around with frank admiraton. "What do we... Where did he go?" Their guide was gone and the two women found themselves alone in this large chamber, which they now knew to be under the castle. There were vast numbers of weapons, all of a rather medieval nature as far as they could see.

Kate was nearly paralyzed with fear, but Dana bounced on the balls of her feet in apparent glee.

"Why are you looking so happy?"

"Because if I have weapons we might not die." Dana was already hefting the swords and daggers, trying their heft to find the best fit. She lifted her skirt and tore the skirt of her underdress into strips, fashioning loops to suspend various knives about her person. She actually began to hum, low under her breath.

Kate shook her head. "I'm glad you feel better, but we still don't know what the haps are here. Might I remind you we're under a huge fortress with a dragon as a cake topper?"

"Oh, I know that," Dana grimaced. "But we have weapons now. And you have to have some on you too. I don't suppose you know how to use a sword? No, I suppose not."

Kate picked up a small knife with two fingers, looking at it with her nose wrinkled. "The only thing I know how to do with this is cut a steak."

"Funny thing, we are serving steak tonight," A deep voice boomed from the top of a stairwell they had not noticed. "Won't you ladies accompany me as we shall all be dining very shortly and I am sure you would like time to freshen up first."

Their eyes moved up to see a man garbed in rich attire standing at the top of the stairs.

"Oh shit," Kate said.

Dana just stuffed one more knife into the breast of her gown.

The plot thickens

Kate and Dana looked at each other, then the door of the house, then shrugged. They had to do something, soon, or night would fall and who knew what dangers lurked in this place after dark.

Kate leaned closer to Dana, "I'm getting hungry. Do you suppose they will offer us anything to eat?"

"If they do, it will probably not be anything we recognize, but I'm hungry, too."

The door opened a little more as they approached, allowing them to slip inside, then it was closed with a bang behind them. When they turned to face the door, they saw that it was being barred with a large piece of iron by a little man no taller than Dana's waist.

"Ummm...hello?" Kate said. "You signaled?" It sounded trite, but she couldn't think of any other way to say it, even if it did earn her a disgusted look from her companion.

"I did," he said, turning back toward them and crossing his arms across his very broad chest. "Did they send you?"

"They?" Kate was startled, but Dana recovered quickly.

"Yes, or at least she did."

"She," he drew a deep breath and smiled. "If She sent you, then you are the ones we've been waiting for." He hurried over to a door next to the hearth, his short, bowed legs almost wobbing in his haste. "Come this way, hurry."

Kate cast a regretful look at the fragrant stew simmering over the wood fire, but apparently there were issues more pressing than the feeding of guests, and she turned away and followed Dana toward the door.

"Hurry! It's almost dark." The little man's voice sounded far away, as though he had entered a tunnel, and when Kate passed through the door, ducking her head as she encounted the low ceilinged stairway leading down, down, deep into the earth under the house.

"Crap," Dana said. "My claustrophobia is going to act up for sure."

"Take my hand," Kate reached forward through the darkness. "If we don't get separated, maybe you'll feel better."

"Oh yeah, the big bad dragonslayer has to hold hands to keep from freaking out in the scary tunnel. This will look great in my memoirs."

Kate held onto Dana's hand and followed her down the stairs, flight after flight of rickety wooden steps that seemed more made for the little man's size than theirs, until she lost count of how many they had descended. But finally they stood in the dirt, only a little hunched over from the low ceiling.

"You doing okay?" Kate asked Dana, leaning close to her ear to try not to let the little man know what they discussed.

"Fine. So far anyway. You'd better let go of my hand, because I may need them at some point. But thanks."

Kate looked around at the tunnel. It had been carved out of bedrock, and the walls were nearly smooth, except for some marks from the carving tools. They were a grayish white and..."Dana, I can see."

"Of course you can see," Dana said. "Why wouldn't you?

"Dana, do you see any light around here?"

Dana looked around. There were no lights, at least not in terms of light fixture. Yet is was possible to see everything around them clearly. She turned and faced the little man, who stood tapping his foot in front of them.

"Sir...may I aske your name? I am Dana and this is my friend Kate, and we have been very rude not to introduce ourselves."

He looked up and up at them and grimaced. "We don't have time to slow down. I told you, it's almost dark! But if you must, I am Cobwen, one of the village elders, and am charged with setting you off on your quest."

He began to hurry off down the passageway, his legs covering a surprising amount of ground for such a short guy.

"I think we're headed toward the castle," Dana said.

"I think so too, oh, where did he go?"

Cobwen had disappeared around a corner, and when they reached him he stood in a large, by comparison with the tunnel, anyway, open chamber filled with ...

Kat and Dana at the Village

Every house looked shut down, shutters closed tightly, not even a dog in a dooryard to bark and draw attention to the visitors walking down the dusty main street of the village. Although it was still a dirt road, there were some disturbingly modern-seeming elements.

"Is that a solar panel?" Kate stood on tip-toe to try and get a better look at the roof of the nearest cottage.

"It sure looks like it," Dana answered, head tilted to one side. "Castles and dragons and solar panels. Even for me this is an unusual day."

"Well, we really need some answers. I'm going to knock on the door." Kate strode up the lipstick red door of the little house and rapped, then banged when nobody answered. "I can hear them in there," she said, frustrated.

They walked down the road, taking turns knocking on the door of each house they passed, but the results were the same. After just a few minutes, they got to the other end of the street and ran out of cottages.

"What do we do now?" Kate asked. "I don't really want to go too far away from where we fell in."

"No, me either," Dana tapped a finger against her cheek. "I guess we had better turn around and take our chances at the castle. I know we're here for a purpose, but I hate to face that dragon unarmed. I'm just not used to it!"

"You're right, but I don't know what else to try." Kate's mind was thinking furiously, trying to come up with other options, but there just weren't any to be had. So the two friends turned and walked back down the village street, limping slightly now, slippers all raggedy on the bottom and hardly worth even wearing.

Just as they came again to the first house, the one where they had noticed the solar panels, the door opened and a hand came out, waving. "Come here, quick!"

Kate and Dana - Part 5

The pathway around the grassy hillock looked smooth, and would have been had the ladies been wearing Nikes, but in satin slippers with only slightly thickened soles, every rock came through and by the time they got to where they could see the village itself, Dana was limping and Kate had uttered more than one unladylike word.
"I don't like this," Dana said.
"I don't either. My feet are one big bruise, I think," Kate replied.
Dana gave her a level look. "I don't mean our feet. Look where we are. The village is only a few hundred yards away, but I don't see any kind of activity. No farm carts headed into market, no animals grazing in the fields. And the crops look decidedly neglected.

Kate had never been as observant as Dana. Of course, she worked in an office, and Dana was practically a superhero with her work in dragonslaying. "It does look kind of quiet."

"And, in my experience, that's never good."

"But the crops are there, and the village doesn't look bad enough to be abandoned. At least not unless it wa pretty recently. I see laundry out on the lines behind some of the cottages."

"Right. And that actually is more alarming. Why did everyone suddenly pick up and leave? Unless maybe they are cowering inside. Something bad has happened, probably as recently as today. Something frightening enough to stop everyone's regular activities."

"Any ideas?" Kate was very happy to let Dana postulate. Crises were her venue.

"No, not really. But he," she pointed over her shoulder, "The big winged guy on the tower, might very well be part of it."

"You think he's new? I don't know much about these things, but I thought that tower was his usual spot. With the flag and all, he landed there as though it were an everyday matter."

Dana frowned. "Yes, I think so, too. But what makes today different? That's what we have to find out." She leaned on Kate's arm and shook a stone out of her slipper. The bottom was starting to look a bit shredded, but that couldn't be helped.

"Okay, then," Kate said. "If you agree, we will just continue to the village. We can knock on doors and see if anyone will open up and talk to us - tell us what's going on."

"I don't have a better idea." Dana shrugged and they continued down the path. The crops did look a bit neglected, but that could just be bad farming, although Dana knew people would starve if the farmsers hereabouts were that bad at caring for their grains. Other than that, the path was well maintained, a smooth downgrade leading toward the open street of the small village.

As the got closer, Kate noticed that the houses were mostly overgrown cottages with a Tudor flair. The walls were nearly all white and made of what at least looked like stucco to her, with exposed decorative timbers on their front walls. "I think this village is a little nice for serfs to inhabit, at least the kind I've heard of."

"It is nice, isn't it?" Dana stopped at the edge of the village and looked around. "It gets stranger and stranger. It almost feels modern for some reason."

Kate was looking up and down the street as well, and began to walk forward. Dana followed her, but they were both completely on edge. If this was the Middle Ages, as Kate had more or less assumed, then people lived much better than she had read. Colorful flowers overflowed from pots lining brick walkways leading up to the houses. The doors were painted bright colors, red, green, a couple blue.

Suddenly she stopped walking and grabbed Dana's sleeve. "Dana...what is that on that roof?"

Kate and Dana...Part 4

The road to the ruined castle was steep and winding, and didn't look at all inviting. Where they now stood was a bit of a low rise that gave them a view of the surrounding countryside. As Kate looked, she could see forest to her left, wrapping around behind her, deep and dark and not welcoming. The castle was of course in front, but to her right, a path led around a hillock, and over its grassy top she could just see what looked to be a belltower.

Dana leaned on Kate's arm and shook a rock out of her slipper. She held the satiny shoe in front of her and stared at it. "This is not my shoe."

Kate looked at her shoe, then took in the rest of her friend. "Dana, that's not what you were wearing this morning in the library, is it?" She knew it wasn't, but babbling seemed the only thing to do in such an odd situation.

Dana looked down at her outfit. It was an emerald green dress, made of a very heavily woven fabric, ground length, and a corset-like contraption held in her waist and made her usually subtle bosom seem to float above the device, threatening to spill over at any moment. "No, I wasn't wearing this. I would remember." Her face was a picture.

Kate's outfit was also not part of her ordinary library-going wardrobe. She was pretty sure she had been wearing leggings and an oversized USC sweatshirt, but now she was clad in a bronze gown in a similar style to Dana's, and a twitch of the skirt showed her the same impractically soled slippers.

"Well, this is a problem," Kate said.

"Particularly, since I don't seem to have a single weapon with me," Dana patted her sides as though a broadsword might be concealed there, "and that is most definitely a dragon up there."

"He could be nice?" Kate looked hopeful.

"Yes, he could be." But Dana didn't look like she thought that likely.

"Well we can't stay here forever. What do you want to do?" Kate wasn't a dragonslayer like Dana, she was an ordinary, run of the mill person who hadn't a heroic bone in her flip-flop wearing body.

Dana turned in a slow circle. "I can't think of a good reason to go into that forest, and I don't think these silly shoes will handle the rocky way up to that crumbling heap. I don't want to go up there without a better idea of what I'm facing anyway, and I have to get weapons, somehow. So," she pointed to her right, "I vote for the village, or whatever it is, over there. Someone will know what's going on here - I hope."

There was nothing to argue with there, Dana's logic seemed flawless, so the two confused women set off down the path toward the belltower, hoping to find a village at its base, with someone who might be able to tell them what the heck was going on.

Kate and Dana and the Book of Shadows -Part 3

Kate leaned away from the book, looking startled. Dana, however, leaned closer and the lady grasped her hand and tugged, causing Dana to tumble head over heels into the world behind the picture. Kate stared a second and then, as the lady's hand stretched again, shrugged and took it, entering the picture only slightly more gracefully than her companion, landing on hard ground in a sitting position with a thump.

After a moment of darkness, her vision cleared. Yes, she was sitting on the ground, and Dana was lying face down next to her. But Dana didn't seem to be conscious - her eyes were closed and her breathing sounded a little raspy and uneven.

"Dana." She leaned over to look at her friend's face. "Dana, are you okay?" There was no immediate reply and Kate wasn't sure what to do. Her knowledge of first aid was sketchy and hadn't been updated since high school. Don't move the victim - that was all she could remember for sure. So, for the next eternity, although it was probably only a few minutes, she sat next to Dana and petted her hair, trying not to panic.

Suddenly, Dana drew a deep breath and groaned. "What happened?" She opened her eyes and struggled to sit up. With a little help from Kate, she managed it, and her eyes popped wide as she took in the vista in front of her.

Kate followed her line of vision and together they stared. The castle was there, ancient and crumbling, but a crimson flag fluttered from one crenelated tower and let them know that it was not abandoned. It seemed to have a golden image on it, but they were too far away to make out exactly what it was.

A long path wound up the side of the mountain, leading to the fortress, and Kate saw a small pack team making its way up. Supplies. Another sign of life. And then, from behind the castle, rising up into the late afternoon sunshine, glinting off its wings - wings the same rose gold as the lettering on that last page in the book of shadows - came the dragon. Wings flared, it settled onto the top of the flagged tower, then in an instant disappeared.

The looked at each other and back at the castle. What did this mean? Where were they?

Kate remembered something. "Dana, where did the lady go?" Because she was not there, had not been there since they arrived.

"I don't know." Dana moved to her knees then to stand up. "But I think I know where we need to go for answers."

Kate and Dana and the Book of Shadows - A Free Read

Where were we? Oh yes, the glowing book of shadows in the library...

Kate leafed through the pages. The letters seemed to move and dance under her fingertips, more texture than a printed page should have. Each page held spells for different situations. There were love spells, spells to repel an enemy, or to do worse to them, spells to heal ailments. She glanced as she turned the pages, watching the letters glitter under the flourescent library lights. The drawings were so three dimensional, the colors so rich and vibrant, she expected one of the little figures to leap out of the book and plop down on the couch with her and Dana.

"Anything there, Kate?"

"Anything? Everything." Kate drew a breath as she reached a page with an illustration of a sorcerer and his wand. In the picture, the gowned magician wielded a long wand to turn a base metal - maybe iron, she wasn't sure- to gold. "Look at this, Dana."

"Alchemy?" Dana asked, leaning closer to see better.

"Sort of, but I never heard of it being attempted by pointing a wand at it."

Dana gasped. "Look, the wand is sparking, right into the air." There were indeed live sparks in the air over the little drawing.

It was hard to turn away from the sorcerer, who seemed to be aware of them, staring out of his page with blazing black eyes, but the book had ideas of its own. As soon as Kate lifted her hand from the page, it turned of its own volition to another section, about halfway through the large volume.

On this page the letters were no longer merely gold but a glowing rose gold. And nearly half the page was taken up by another living illustration, this one a woman with long, white blonde hair that reached nearly to her waist. She wore a girdled dress that looked like something from the middle ages, and she was holding a sword in her left hand.

In the background was a castle, on a steep cliff overlooking a stormy sea. And in the air, above the castle, flying toward the lady, was...

"Oh shit," Dana said, earning a shush from a nearby librarian, "There goes my vacation.

Kate and Dana and the Book of Shadows - A Free Read

Dana slipped into the library to find Kate sitting in a big chair with the sunlight streaming over her shoulder. Kate had a big book open on her lap and the light was illuminating the words in a way that made Dana think it was not an ordinary book.

"Hey," Dana said. "What's up?"

Kate jumped a little. It seems she had been so intent on her reading she hadn't heard Dana approach. Which was saying somethin, because when Dana Dragonslayer approaches, she clanks a little from the weapons she carries everywhere for her work.

Dana laughed. Kate always makes her giggle, even when she is at her most serious. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. What are you reading?"

Kate looked up at her friend. "A very old Book of Shadows. I actually came her for a quick read, maybe a nice Steph Beck, something with a bit of fantasy, but when I went to the back shelves this book lit up."

"Lit up? You mean it looked interesting?"

"No," Kate said. "Lit up, golden, rays of light illuminating the dust motes. Like in the fairy tales."

"And what did you say it was again?"

"A Book of Shadows. A witch's spell book. But I come here all the time, and I swear it was never there before. So why is it there now?"

"Oh good, a mystery," Dana said, plopping down next to Dana and looking over her shoulder at the text. "It really is glowing, isn't it?"

"Oh, Dana, can you see it too?"

"Can't everyone?" She looked around the room, but it was obvious that nobody else was staring at the gleaming book. "I guess not."

"If you can see it, and you're not even a witch, then it must mean you are supposed to be helping me."

"Helping you do what?"

"I have no idea." Kate grinned. "Sounds fun, doesn't it?"

"I guess," Dana narrowed her eyes. "As long as it doesn't involve dragons. I came in here today to pick up a book to read, because I am on vacation!"

(to be continued)

Erotica or Not-Erotica

As I learn to be a writer of erotica I have found out something disturbing about myself. While my mind has no trouble envisioning scenes of passionate lovemaking, while I love reading other authors stories of wild menages, my Catholic school fingers have trouble typing the words it takes to tell the stories as clearly as they should. Having left that religion long behind for earth based pagan religions (read Witch), my fingers have apparently lagged behind and want me to use words that, well, don't exactly express my scenes in the way I want them to. But I have had a long talk with them, and they have agreed to try! So we shall see.... I don't want to have to get out the yardstick~!

Why writing is like knitting

I sit here surrounded by wip's. I have more stories in progress than I like to admit to, one rewrite requested, two contest entries and an anthology submission, a young adult requested by my nephews that I think will be a really great story (I have to think of a pen name for my ya work) AND about six of my in progress knitting projects. I know life is a wip, but why is it that the beginning and ending of a project are so much more fun than the middles. Life is Not like an Oreo cookie!

More on Series Romance

I have been wondering lately if every author has the same experience I have. We are told to keep our secondary characters in the background and pay attention to the main storyline. And as an editor I can see how important that is. But I find my secondary characters, the best friend, cousin, acquaintance from work...all have such strong personalities fighting to come through that all I can do is promise their own story to keep them in line. And often they turn out to be so interesting that I'm thrilled with the result.

Barbara, who will star in my second Carnivore Club, had a very minor role in the last book, but as I started to write the second one, I said to my husband, Barbara is a dominatrix! Who knew? (He thinks I'm nuts, but he's happy it makes me happy to do this lol) Anyway, I'm loving writing Barbara's story, and I can't wait to see what character will be the next hero or heroine in this ongoing tale of small town folks who get together to celebrate their uniqueness on Tuesdays at the Carnivore Club

Writing Series Romance

I never set out to write serial stories, but it seems as though each one leads to the next. For example, once I told the story of Finally, My Love, I realized that the internet is a place where so many people meet that there must be a million stories in the naked www. So that led to PerfectPartners.com followed by Internet Romance Three, Who is that Woman? That one is not quite done.

Next I wrote Confessions from the Carnivore Club: Dave and Nancy's Story. Once I walked into the story, I knew that everyone I encountered had their own story. Barbara's story is coming next.

I think the advantage to short or novella length stories is that they lend themselves easily to this sort of serial. After all, I often want to hear more about the secondary characters in books I read. And this way, I get to hear all about them.

Release Day is Coming

Release Day is coming for Finally, My Love and I will be sharing the day at GRR with multi-pubbed author Olivia Starke who is also having a release the same day! We will party all day and give away prizes!

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,
I'm back home, safe. And so are most of the people who were involved in the Dragon protest. The story is too long to fit in here, but I'll put it in my longer journal entries, because it's important not to forget any detail. Especially since I learned something about Dragons that I would never have believed possible. Gotta go get some sleep now, or I'll fall asleep right here. It's good to be home.
Dana

Guest Blogging!

Hi, this is Kate again. I'm going to be blogging tomorrow, May 1 at Gina Gordon's 12 Days of Sexy Times. http://blog.ginagordon.net. It should be fun, so come by and see what scenes I've selected from my favorite sexy books of all time. Also, check out Gina's new book coming out May 28, called Wicked Ride. It looks to have more than its own share of sexy scenes!

I haven't seen any posts from Dana today, hope she's okay up there in the mountains...

Dana's Diary

Dear Diary,
When I was told the assignment involved protesting dragons, I pictured dragons in their human form carrying signs and insisting on equal treatment under mining law or something. People need to be clearer when they request my help. Shoot, there it goes again. Someone is really going to get hurt around here.
Talk to you later,
Dana

New Book from Breathless Press

Sorry to interrupt Dana's diary, but I wanted to report that Breathless Press has just accepted Perfect Partner's Dot Com, the second in my Tales of Internet Romance series. This is a humorous take on the internet dating site scene, and I love working with Breathless, I'm really excited.
Kate

Dear Diary...

Dear Diary,
I don't have too much time to write today, because the dragon problem up here above Bentley, California is worse than I thought. It's just lucky I brought all my gear. Protesting dragons? ttyl
Dana

Dear Diary, Love Dana

Dear Diary,
As it turns out, not everyone had my cell phone. Seymour didn't have it. I'm not sure why not, but he didn't. So I woke up this morning to the unbelievable, Seymour knocking on my door. I didn't even know he was in town. There's been a string of dragon related problems in a town about fifty miles south of here, right in the mountains. I'll have to head there later today and see if I can figure out how to fix the problem. It's very unusual, they're not flaming anyone or anything, they are protesting? I have no idea what that means, but I'm heading out first thing in the morning and I'll fill you in when I know more. Wish me luck!

Dana's Diary

Dear Diary,
What a day it was today! I thought the phone would never stop ringing. I live in a tiny corner of Nevada at the foot of the Sierras, so you would think that things would be very quiet here. And usually they are, but that reporter who was at the hotel the other night, when that woman was killed, apparently worked for some national gossip sheet. He, or maybe his editor, thought that I made a good story for their front page. Great, now people all over the country can get a gander at my working clothes while they wait to buy their groceries. Until today I had a listed phone number. But now that people think they've located an expert, they all want to find out if their next door neighbor or the librarian is a dragon. I can't seem to convince them that I can't tell over the phone about people I've never met. And not all dragons are villains. By about nine this morning I stopped trying to explain, by ten I was hanging up on them, and by noon, I just unplugged the phone, although I hated to do it. But my family and the police have my cell number in case of emergency. I'm going to bed! Nite .

Edits

Well...I got my first edits today and I'm anxious to get started on them. I can already see how my editor's suggestions will make the story move better as well as increase its heat.

Book cover for Finally, My Love

Well, here's the cover of Finally. My Love. Thank you so much Annie Melton, the artist to did this lovely cover for my first story to be published very soon by Breathless Press.

Finally, My Love News

Well, I've heard from my editor, Clarissa, and my cover artist, Annie, and I am incredibly lucky to have them, I can tell already. I'm not sure how much I'll have to do with my story, but I'm excited to see what she comes up with. As an editor myself, I know how much a story comes together with another set of eyes to help polish it up. I must remember that! And I can't wait to see the cover art! More news as I get it.

I really think online romance is a great genre in itself. Everywhere I go people are telling me their stories, and they have a fantastic happy ever after rating. Not once has someone told me that they met someone online and are now divorced from them. I'm sure it happens, and I know from personal experience that everyone we meet online is not the end all, but that's life. If you want to share your stories, we'd all love to hear them.

Spring

Spring is here and it's time to start getting ready for summer...well, warm weather at least. I'd hate to wish spring away. Hope everyone is having a great growing season.

Spring!

Spring is coming soon, I can tell because my nephews and nieces all went to Diaz Lake up in the Sierras for the freeze your butt off and maybe catch a trout South Inyo County Early Season Opener. If my sis in law's pics are any indication, they had a great time and caught at least one fish between them. Anyway, if you're ever in the area on the coldest weekend in March, check it out!

Valentine's Day Swing by Kate

The entire living room was wall to wall groping, naked bodies. Why had coming here seemed like such a good idea at the time? At least, why had I allowed myself to be dragged here by my date for the evening? Alcohol had to have been involved, in fact it had been. I didn’t drink often and at some point in the dinner party, after the cocktails, wine with dinner, and that coffee drink after that tasted like more proof than coffee, everyone had decided to pack up and check out the private club. And I had laughed and jumped right in the car along with my date and the other couples who had made up our Valentine’s Day party. I was only out with this guy because it was Valentine’s Day and I didn’t want to stay home alone, so I accepted an office friend’s fixup. A dinner party in a nice restaurant sounded safe enough. Right.
It had seemed like a lark, a funny idea, and a story I could tell later in life about my wild evening. But by the time we were at the big house in the back of hell and gone (really, that was the address, I’m pretty sure), I was sobering up and really about half panicked. And in my underwear. Only my underwear.
It was a rule, to get in you had to strip down to bra and panties, unless you were a guy, then there was most likely no bra. And the woman at the door, she had to weigh at least five hundred pounds, and she had locked up all of the clothes and purses and things, for safekeeping, she said. My date had the claim check.
I looked around the house, which looked much too expensive for the activities it was hosting. I’m no expert on furniture or glassware, but the broken vase by the door had probably cost more than my car, and those stains were not going to come out of the couch. My date had dumped me for a blonde with lavender see-through panties and a big smile. I was now completely sober, and freaked out and I wanted to go home.
So there I stood, bra, panties, no purse, no clothes, no ride, pressed against the sliding glass door at the back of the house, considering calling 911 just to get the place raided so I could get the hell out of there. . Even if they took me to jail, it would be an improvement. They gave you a nice orange jumpsuit there, right? The cold of the glass against my skin was a comforting, because the room was filled with sweaty, grunting people, and way overheated. Could people actually raise a room’s temperature with enough friction?
Then, the cold glass was gone, and I was falling. Falling into the arms of a fully dressed man who had opened the door and was standing there looking appalled, and holding her against his very muscular chest. Amazing what a person could notice in stressful situations. He pushed me away from him and stared, from the tip of my auburn up-do rapidly becoming a down-do, past black lace bra and matching panties, and down to the tips of my red polished toes.
“What the hell are you doing in my house?” he demanded, shaking me until my teeth rattled.
“Nothing. I’m doing nothing.”
“Then why are you in your underwear? Get out of my house.” He attempted to push me back through the door, odd since he wanted me out, but I clung to his arms. No way was I going back in there.
“I am out of your stupid house,” I sobbed, giving in to the hysteria I had been holding back until now. “In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m in your damned yard. Let. Me. Go.”
He cooperated, pushing me away from him so that I fell backwards against the rough wood siding. “Happy? Now, would you care to explain what is going on here in my house? I leave for a few days and I come back to,” he gestured wildly in the direction of the sliding glass door. “This, this, well, words fail me.”
“Me too,” I wailed. “I had too much wine with dinner, and I almost never drink, and then there was that thing with the coffee. Vodka, brandy maybe, I don’t know. All I know is that the next thing I know I was in your living room in my underwear. And did you see what those people are doing in there?”
“Those people? Not you?”
“I still have my underwear on, don’t I? I think you have to take at least some of it off to do, well,” I pointed at a couple almost up against the door. “That.”
“I suppose you do. Well, maybe you can tell me who is responsible.”
“How would I know that? I was on a blind date, and we were all out at dinner, then they wanted to come to a private club and I came. The rest is kind of a blur.”
“But you didn’t...”
“No, I didn’t. I just didn’t have any way to get home.”
“Did you have clothes on when you got here?” He was trying to look politely away, but not really succeeding. His voice, however, was not as loud as it had been.
“Yes, of course I did.”
“Then where are they?”
“That gigantic woman at the front door has them; my date had the ticket for them pinned in his boxers.”
“Well that could hurt couldn’t it? Straight pin? Oh, never mind. So you came in, gave your clothes to that woman and then what?
I had to stop and think. What had happened then? Oh, yeah. “Before the woman there was a man standing by the door. He was taking money.”
“Can you describe him?”
“No, not really, he was tall and heavyset. And he had a weird laugh, I remember now, kind of ‘heh, heh’ like a movie villain.”
“Okay, then.”
“What?” He was too calm, suddenly.
“My brother. He must have gotten into town and found my spare key. I have to kill him now.”
“You can’t kill your brother.” I was sure of that, it was just wrong even if he did host swinger parties in your living room.
“No, I can. I have a gun. Or I could strangle him.” He seemed to be actually considering his options. “The pool isn’t heated right now, but if you drown in it, does that matter?”
I grabbed the lapels of his jacket. “No, you can’t kill him. But maybe there is something we can do.” Now that I wasn’t afraid of being dragged into that mess on the Berber carpeted floor, I was calm and wanting revenge myself. “First, give me that jacket. I can’t plot in my undies.”
He handed me the buttery soft brown leather jacket and I pulled it over my shoulders. There, much better already. He was so much taller than I was that it hung over my thighs and covered anything I was especially worried about. Now I could think clearly. He was not only tall, but had the most amazing grey eyes framed by long, sooty lashes. And night black hair that reflected the light, just like Superman’s in the comics, almost blue-black.
There was a bench over in a corner of the yard, mostly concealed by trees. I pointed to it. “Let’s go over there and sit down for a moment and make our plans.”
“What do you have in mind?” In shirtsleeves, he was broad shouldered and that distracted me for a moment.
I started to lead the way to the bench. The panic had faded and I was ready for action. “You say your brother has made this mess. Let’s make him clean it up. By the way, my name is Joelli.
“Nice to meet you, Joelli. I’m Aaron.” He sat on the bench and patted the marble next to him. “So, you have a plan?”
“I do. I take it this isn’t the first time your brother has pulled a stunt like this?”
“Well,” he hesitated. “He hasn’t actually set up a swinger’s club in my house before, but he does have a history of being a major pain in my ass.”
“So you aren’t worried if he is humiliated?”
“No, I would love him to be humiliated. How can you arrange it?”
I held out my hand. “Cell phone? Mine is in my purse, currently being held hostage.” I took the smartphone from him and dialed. “Hello, Jerry? Do you still do the bridal showers? And can you reach any of the other boys? They are? Right now?” I covered the phone and whispered, “They’re all out at a bar together, and have their costumes and stuff in their cars” I went back to the phone, “Gerry, hun, here’s what I need you to do.”
Aaron watched me closely through the call, one eyebrow cocked, and a twinkle in those gorgeous eyes. “Should I ask? Or wait to be surprised with the rest of them?”
“Up to you. If we wait back here, we can watch through the door and enjoy the mayhem from a distance.”
It was no trouble to sit and talk with Aaron. It turned out we both worked in banking and we had a wonderful time talking business and accounting and other dry topics, side by side on the narrow marble bench, while we waited for my plan to come to fruition.
About fifteen minutes later, we could see the fun begin through the flat screen of the glass doors.
“We need popcorn for this show,” Aaron quipped.
“Yes or maybe bonbons.”
“You get bonbons at the movies too?” He smiled at me as though I had done a very smart thing.
“Of course, but never nachos.” I nodded wisely. “The grease from the cheese always soaks through the box and ends up in my lap.”
The movie we were watching at that particular moment was an action film. Probably European, as all the fleeing actors were naked, or nearly so. The policemen menacing them were wearing uniforms that had never seen the inside of a police station. They were tear-aways that were customarily worn to do lap dances, but Jerry and his fellow strippers seems to relish the role of ‘real’ policeman as they waved their nightsticks (vibrators, but as long as nobody pushed any buttons by mistake...) and we could see their mouths moving as they ushered the naked, flailing guests toward the front door.
I saw at least one local politician in the mix, along with my date from earlier and his friends. Also, a local TV weather bunny who I had often thought looked more like a cocktail waitress than the meteorologist she claimed to be. And, yes, they were fake; nobody’s boobs bounce like that if they are original models.
At first, we stared in fascination, but once Aaron began to laugh, I joined him. We held each other to keep from sliding off the narrow bench as tears ran down my face. Then the room and the ones down the hallway finally cleared and Jerry came and opened the door to wave at us.
“All safe now, ma’am, sir.”
“Thank you officer,” I fought to stay serious and play with my friend in his new role. “I believe you saved my virtue.”
At that, Jerry grinned and pointed at my companion. “I’m not sure about that, Joelli. The way that guy is looking at you; your virtue may still be in danger. Shall I run him downtown?”
“No, but you can take me back with you if you guys have room in the car? What are there, five or six of you?”
“Six, but you can sit on someone’s lap. C’mon. Let’s find your clothes and get going.”
Aaron stood up, pulling me with him. “I don’t think your virtue would be safe sitting on a male stripper’s lap in a car full of the guys. If you don’t mind, I will go find my brother, make sure I get my key back, and then I’ll give you a ride home.”
“Oh, no. You don’t have to do that. You have a real mess to clean up here, and it’s so late.”
He slipped an arm around my shoulder and hugged me against his side. “No, it’s no trouble. This has been quite a fascinating evening, and I would like to get to know you better. You saved me from a house full of sex maniacs. I would like to walk you to your door and maybe even get a goodnight kiss, if you don’t think it will compromise you too badly.”
I lifted to tiptoe and pressed my lips to his. “Before I saved you, you had already saved me. I would be very pleased to have you take me home.”
His other arm joined the first and he pressed me full against him, so I knew he was not too turned off the the pervs writhing on his living room floor. When he kissed back, I never wanted it to end, but finally he pushed me back a little.
“Good, because I think you’re gorgeous in black lace, and have a quick mind, but I’d love an explanation of how you ended up in my house this way. You don’t seem the type.”
My dear friend, my oldest friend, Jerry burst out laughing. “Man, you have no idea. I could tell you stories.”
“No, you may not.” I said as sternly as possible. “Aaron, let’s go find my clothes, And my purse. I want to go home.” I grabbed his hand and began to tug him behind me toward the house, but he looked back at Jerry the pretend cop.
“What do you think? Does she like me?”
“Like you?” The jerk actually winked at me. “I think she might. Just don’t move too fast, you know she’s been traumatized tonight.”
I glared at him. “Thanks, Jerry. I think you’ve done enough tonight. You’d better go put that nightstick back in your night table.”
He opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it and just said, “Night guys. See you soon, Jo,” and wandered back to collect his swaggering friends.
“Now they will all want to be cops. Those boys will never grow up.” I shook my head sadly.
“But do you?” Aaron asked, holding me with the force of his gaze?
“Like you? Yes, I suppose I might.”
“And should I move very slowly? Are you traumatized?”
I lifted again on tiptoe to reach his lips. “Maybe a little, but I think what I need is an antidote.”
He reached down and lifted me up in his arms. “The guest house is still dark and locked up, it’s probably safe.”
And he carried me off in his arms, to a little house at the back of the garden, surrounded by roses, where we did our best to wipe out the memories of earlier in the evening. And that is the true story of how I met the man I will marry tomorrow, why I have six strippers at my party, and why his brother had to beg for an invitation to the ceremony. I did vote for him to come, after all, if he hadn’t held his party, we wouldn’t be holding this one.

Zelda's Valentine

Zelda Zombie woke up wild with excitement. It was her first Valentine’s Day as a zombie. She had not been very successful as a living person in the romance department and had therefore surmised that she had some great times coming in the hereafter, which was now the here and now.

The big dance was the talk of the town, and Zelda was prepared with a lovely floor length gown in a shade of lavender satin that really set off her pallid complexion. The gown’s long sleeves were practically a guarantee that no arms, at least, would go flying off at an inopportune moment while dancing or necking. Panty hose should keep things together in other areas.

But first, it was time to go out to the mailbox and see how many admirers had left cards and gifts for her enjoyment. Zelda had discovered a liking for chocolate covered gopher brains and had seen a big display of them in the Grave’s Department Store window. She skipped down the path, only dragging one leg slightly in her hurry to retrieve her mail.

Zelda saw her neighbors Lavinia and Elbert headed for their mailboxes as well. Lavinia squealed and gathered her treasures in her arms, chortling as she headed back to her one story trench house. Elbert, on the other hand, flung his hands in the air in his excitement, a mistake, as he then had to use the one still attached to retrieve the other and run back in the house for repairs before he could grab his goodies. Flamboyant sort, Elbert.

The mailbox at the end of Zelda’s driveway loomed, pregnant with possibilities as she approached. Could flowers fit inside? Maybe a tasteful coffin spray? Her hand trembled as she pulled open the little door to see...nothing. She leaned closer, nothing, really? Disappointment threatened to make her fall apart.

Wait; there was something inside, way at the back. A little blue card that said, ‘Roses and red, Violets are blue, I have a big treat, tonight, for you. See you at the dance.’ and it was signed, ‘your secret admirer.’

Once again, she was alight with anticipation. She had to go to her hair appointment, and get it all stuck back in, then maybe she would go pick out a new evening bag in case anything fell off and had to be held onto until she could get to the ladies room and put her face back on. Then a long, relaxing bath and it would be time for the dance.

The afternoon flew, as did Zelda, running errands and getting ready and then it was time to go. She tripped down to the Zombietown Community Center where the disco ball cast its spinning shards of light on the faces of revelers young and old. When Zelda entered, she felt like the queen of the ball, in her beautiful dress, with her hair firmly attached for the evening in a cascade of coffin curls. She swept through the door and into the middle of the dance floor, turning slowly in a circle, waiting for her secret admirer and his promised treat. She saw the mayor and Chompers over by the brain buffet and tasteful blood fountain. The note was in her bag for luck, worn at the creases already from the many times she had folded and unfolded it to bask in the warmth of her admirer’s sweet words and poetry.

At first, nobody approached her and she began to worry. What if he couldn’t come, what if his leg got caught on the bus, or he bumped his head getting out of a cab and had to go have it sewn back on? What if he had changed his mind? She was almost worked up enough to start shedding nails when a small child came up and handed her yet another note.

She opened it, and it said ‘Violets are blue, Roses are red, Don’t you be thinking that I’ve lost my head, look behind you.’

He was a mind reader. She turned and, right behind her, was the handsome news anchor Grief Abandon. She had heard that he and Zanku Kitty had broken up sometime after their parade-announcing gig, but she had no idea he even knew who she was. There he was, in his baby blue tux, holding out his arms to her, almost all his fingers intact. She stepped into his arms and he swung her out onto the dance floor, almost but not quite leaving the bottom half of her behind. She thanked providence for the suspenders holding her bra to her pantyhose that helped her keep it together.

The tall zombie swept her around the floor in a mad whirl that made her head spin, a couple of times. He bent to place his lips to her ear and she heard ‘oops,” before he patted the ear back in place. It was so romantic.

The evening passed in a dizzying swirl of dancing and flirting. She really was the belle of the ball and all the fellows cut in to have a dance with her. Then, when the band was playing “Good Night, Irene,” they change the song to “Good Night, Zelda.” And Grief asked if she would see him again, and then kissed her on the lips, and nothing got mushed or squished.

When she had gotten home and changed into her comfy graveclothes, Zelda Zombie knelt by the side of her bed to say her prayers. And while images of her evening as Cinderella danced through her mind, she prayed that her prince, Grief, would have pleasant dreams until the next time he held her in his arms, or whatever he had handy.

Winter on 395

The Dragon's Lair is just around the bend